If You're With me, Why am I Alone
by Koshika Minamoto
Summary: Depression.....Koji, I need you! Song fic.


This fanfic is based on my real life feeling …. Don't read it if you're gonna judge me and think I'm crazy. If you don't understand it then don't criticize my feelings towards life! People think it's stupid…it's not…can't they see?

**If I Was with Someone, Why am I Alone?**

Her heart pounded up and down in her throat as she stared over the edge of the railing she stood on. The bridge was so high up. This was it, life or death.

_This can kill me. It could die. Should I? Isn't that what I came here to learn?Or did I just want to scare myself…No once cares see, so what the hell? _her thought were deep.

A gentle drizzle started to float down, the clouds moved in. What a gloomy day. Well, it should have been. Her hair lay flat against her head as it started to rain. She didn't move and inch, but her hand shook with fear as she clasped a pole beside her on the railing.

_I'm standing on the bridge  
I'm waiting in the dark  
I thought that you'd be here by now_

There's nothing but the rain  
No footsteps on the ground  
I'm listening, but there's no sound

She looked down at her feet, watching the waves, crash into each other. She stared at the distance below her, a hollow, lifeless, stare of depression and fear. No one knew where she was right now. If they did, who take it seriously? Rain dripped down her face as she wanted to cry but she tried to be brave.

_Isn't anyone trying to find me?  
Won't somebody come take me home  
It's a damn cold night  
Trying figure out this life  
Won't you, take me by the hand, take me somewhere new  
I don't know who you are but i, I'm with you  
I'm with you_

Car horns honked at her as they splashed past her, and she flashed a glance of irritation at them.

_What the hell is their problem? Like they care! I'm just another suicidal person they see and don't understand why! Some people are and some aren't, stupid people. They think I'm just a dumb kid, toying with my life…Well it's MY life and no one has taken notice to it's extreme before! Stupid selfish people, thinking they know. The only people who do know who are people like me! Standing on the bridge of life…one way, or another…_she thought as she looked back down at the water and tears streamed down her face, she tried to stop them, but they fell. She didn't wipe her face or sniffle them away. Just stared.

_I'm looking for a place  
I'm searching for a face  
Is anybody here I know  
Cause nothing's going right and  
Everythings a mess  
And no-one like's to be alone_

She herd foot steps splash from a distance. She barely took notice. She didn't even want to know who the stranger was that lurked behind her. She glared over the edge, angry, at herself, the world and everything. The desperately wanted to know why but the only thing she could find where the tears…rolling down her face. She shivered and tried to hum to make the situation less lonely.

The foot steps stopped and the only thing she herd was the rasping of the persons breath, shaking with fear. But she didn't care who it was she just glared at the ocean, waiting. For what, she didn't know.

Her body trembled with fear, sadness, pain, anger, frustration, lonliness and sorrow. She bent her knees ready to jump…

_Isn't anyone trying to find me?  
Won't somebody take me home_

But as just as she was leaving the railing, a hand grabbed her wrist and pulled her back. The person's grab was so tight she turned around to face him as she fell and smashed into his body. She didn't get a look at his face but she knew who it was…

_It's a damn cold night  
Trying to figure out this life  
Won't you, take me by the hand, take me somewhere new  
I don't know who you are but i, I'm with you  
I'm with you_

Her arms dangled as he held her tight, she didn't want to move, even to put her arms around him. One hand was holding her head to his chest the other, wrapped around her back, securing her. Her face stared out over his shoulder at the cars and lights flashing by. She was depressed by shock, she didn't move an inch. But her eye's watered more.

"Koshi, what are you doing…." the whispered cracked in her ear as he brought his face to the side of her head and closed his eyes, knowing he had her safe, and he clutched her head tighter to him.

As he squeezed her it was like he squeezed out her tears as they rolled down her face once again. But she still stared.

"Please, answer me…" he cried.

"K-Koji…" her voice whispered a shivering cry, "I'm sorry."

"Why would you ever……..do this…knowing that I'm…that I'm here," he stuttered, "and your sister…You can't leave her…"

"I-I know…"she whispered a cry into his ear. But she still stared…at nothing. Like herself.

_Oh, why is everything so confusing  
Maybe I'm just out of my mind  
Yeah yeah yeah  
Yeah yeah  
Yeah yeah  
Yeah yeah  
Yeah_

"Koji! I'm so sorry!" she flung her arms around him as she closed her eyes and buried her face in his shoulder.

"I'm with you…It's OK Koshika. You have nothing to be sorry for. It's not your fault." he soothed her.

Just then someone appeared down the sidewalk holding her hand infront of her stomach, tears making their way down her face.

_It's a damn cold night  
Trying to figure out this life  
Won't you, take me by the hand, take me somewhere new  
_

She looked up and he freed her from his grasped. She stared at her for a second and met her sisters tearful eyes. Then she broke off crying and collided into her sisters arms and they both cried out loud.

_I don't know who you are but i, I'm with you  
I'm with you_

Her sister grabbed Koshika's shoulders and cried, "I'm with you too, Koshika! You're my sister!"

"I'm sorry Hoshi, I just…" Koshika looked down.

_Take me by the hand, take me somewhere new  
I don't know who you are but i, I'm with you_

"It's Ok," Hoshiko smiled as more tears fell down her face and she grabbed her sister tighter.

_I'm with you_

Take me by the hand, take me somewhere new  
I don't know who you are but i, I'm with you

I'm with you  
I'm with you.


End file.
